Many think that the Catholic church only allows sex for the purpose of procreation. But actually, it could be argued that the Church is against the use of sex solely for procreation.
Having sex just to get pregnant can be just as utilitarian as having sex soley for pleasure. And utilitarian actions suffer from the grave danger of using another person. One can be used as an object of breeding just as well as an object of pleasure.
One can feel just as used when pregnancy becomes the all consuming object of one’s sex life, as when gratification becomes the all consuming object of one’s sex life.
If it’s true that the unitive and procreative dimensions of sexuality are inseparable; if it’s true that the unitive should not be separated from the procreative (contraception); and if it’s true that the procreative should not be separated from the unitive (IVF), then doesn’t it follow that we should never intend procreation alone and separate from the unitive? Is there such a thing as trying too hard to get pregnant?
But, what then is the object of sex if we are not to isolate the pleasure nor to isolate procreation?
I think the answer is that love is the object of sex. The Church is for making love. It’s because the Church is for making love that it says no to contraception, and no to lust and license, and no to producing children outside the protective womb of love. But sexual love is indeed inseparable from procreation. Procreation may not be the object of sex, but children are the natural fruit of making love. Try an take the fruit of this love out of the equation, and you cancel out the love itself.
